Texas Independence Day

The forecast was sleet, so we stayed longer in Canyon Lake. The next day the weather was perfect.  We drove, grilled some beef with Allison and Bret, and for the first time saw “The Big Lebowski”.  You remember the lines – Walter (John Goodman) says, over and over ‘Shut * * up, Donny.’  Or in league play he calls a bowling foot-fault:  ‘Smokey, you were over the line.  This is not ‘Nam; this is bowling.  There are rules.’  Good stuff, really good stuff.  Writing comedy is hard – just try it sometime.  I wrote one good joke in my life; how about you?

A Red-Wing Stakes Out His Territory:  Gotta Find a Woman!
A Red-Wing Stakes Out His Territory: Gotta Find a Woman!
Our Last Canyon Lake Sunset
Our Last Canyon Lake Sunset

Between Buda and Kerrville we drove up and down some wriggly if not giggly roads.  In Walnut Springs we blew past one of the world’s best subdivision monuments (that’s developer talk for entry signage) in the form of a rusted steel and polished chrome longhorn steer.  I used to be in land development, and I have long thought that good outdoor art, something thought-provoking that costs under $50,000, would make a big statement about a big project.  And I just saw it: vindicated!

 

World's Best Subdivision Monument:  Marathon, by Bettye Hamblen Turner
World’s Best Subdivision Monument: Marathon, by Bettye Hamblen Turner

Radio becomes scarce in the less populated parts of Texas.  We had good reception until we were halfway to Fort Stockton from Kerrville.  There were times when the SCAN button just rolled and rolled the station numbers.  When we got good reception, we’d listen in just to hear something to break the boredom.   We heard a talk show whose topic was pending local legislation that would ban concealed firearms in bars.  The comment of note was “I can’t imagine anything that goes together better than guns and alcohol.  That ban’s a real dumb idea.”  And later the Texas Secretary of State, who is in charge of voting regulations, informed us that a picture ID is required to vote in any Texas election … “you must present a valid passport, Texas driver’s license, or concealed carry permit.”  Just as I was wondering how I survived living in Texas those six years, this news came on.  The state banned spanking, paddling, and belting in public schools 40 or so years ago.  Today the ACLU and several parents sued the state to go a step further.  They want to ban the use of tasers and pepper spray on students. I couldn’t believe my ears, so I Googled it.  Lord have mercy!  It’s true.  Lots of schools here have police patrolling the hallways, and one of them tasered a kid who collapsed and whacked his head on the floor.  The kid was in a coma for seven weeks.  The Texas Municipal Police Association responded to the taser/spray ban movement by suggesting the request is “misguided and naïve”.

 

Kat  lived in Texas six years, and what did she say about that?  “If somebody tasers or pepper sprays my kid, I’d track ‘em down, and kick their ass!

 

Hank Hill couldn’t say it better.

5 thoughts on “Texas Independence Day

  1. Saw _The Big Lebowski_ way back. 🙂

    If you’ve seen _My Favorite Year_, you’ll know the line “Dying is easy. Comedy is hard.”

    See here, too, under the “Decline and death” section:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edmund_Kean

    Care to share your joke here? 🙂

    Great idea for the sculptures. Validation good, too.

    More beautiful photos, as always. Thanks, Kat.

    K.

    P.S. Will comment more later, and on Texas. Oy.

    Like

    1. Long ago we lived in a fairly nice part of Shreveport, LA, known as Spring Lake. We had a tennis group that hit the ball, cooked, and drank together two or three times a month. We did a big dinner party and the entertainment was a visit from Karnack the Magnificient. I played Ed McMahon, whom you may recall read the answers after opening a sealed envelope, right after Karnack/Carson had in his borderline mysterious way, divined the question and come up with an answer.

      Karnack closed his eyes, pressed his fingers to his forehead, and solemnly intoned “A boob job.”

      Ed opened the envelope and read this question: “What is considered gainful employment by Spring Lake housewives?”

      At least two gals present had already had them. It brought down the house!

      Jackson

      Like

  2. Hilarious.

    I think you must have more than the one joke in you. 😉 🙂

    Yes, I do remember Carson and Ed, and enjoyed this segment.

    If you want a trip down that memory lane, there are (of course) many of them on YouTube:

    I’m not sure if on the road you ever have any access to cable TV, but TCM has been running shorts of Carson guest interviews, including some tonight.

    Thanks for sharing the joke. Well done in setting it up, too. 😀

    K.

    Like

  3. Does this site automatically strip out links to YouTube?

    I’m sending it again here, just in case it will show up now. If not, you can Google for them.

    Like

    1. I’ve tried to enter links to You Tube, but never checked to see if they work. Could be. These WordPress people are ascared of lawyers.

      Like

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